I am hoping that your particular ptsd ultimately gets better. Everything you experienced at 16, isnt very easy to forget or conquer. Also it would have come back in some way years later if you tried to suppress the memory, most likely. Through this if you believe in God, only he can help you. Often we ask, „why me“? It would likely perhaps not seem sensible but possibly there is a good explanation, and I also think all of us have actually an objective right right here.